Tuesday, 17 November 2015

Entitled.


This is a post that I didn't know I'd end up writing, but hopefully getting these words down will help. I just feel like it's important to get these words out there and make people realise the impact that these sorts of things can have on people, and just get down the whirlwind of thoughts which went around my head after this happened.

Okay, enough of being vague.

It happened almost exactly a week ago, I went to a talk about Human Rights law at my university and came home at around 8:30. The streets were quiet, but there were a few people milling about. I noticed three people walking out of a betting shop, but walked by them hurriedly.

I was at my door, keys in my hand and earphones in my ears, meaning I didn't hear anyone behind me. Just as I raised my key to the door, I felt hands around me, touching me, and I let out probably the loudest scream I've ever made. My dad ran to the window and this person, who I noticed was from this group of kids milling about, instantly ran in the opposite direction and out of sight, all while I was hurling a long line of curse words at them. (my brothers chased them but they'd obviously got away).

What I felt more than anything in that moment was this seething anger I'd never experienced before. I was furious, enraged that somebody would even have the nerve to do this, especially when I was so close to entering my home. How could they? How dare they? How sick! A few seconds later and I could have avoided the whole thing.

It wasn't until the next day that the paranoia kicked in, what if I see them again? What if it happens again? I couldn't seem to shake this feeling and I hated it, I hated how this had affected me, how some idiot who thought he was entitled to me couldn't even comprehend how utterly wrong and unfair doing this was.

What bothered me most was that this person was probably younger than me, and it got me wondering - what does it say about society when a young person, in this modern day and age, seems to think that they can lay claim to another person's body? Just writing about this brings back that anger and confusion.

So many excuses are made, she was asking for it, she made it seem like she wanted it, she dressed like a sl** so obviously she wanted me to. It just makes me sick. Because I know that these ridiculous excuses are used all the time as a justification. Seriously, If I had been wearing a mini skirt or a crop top instead of my headscarf and burkha, would that have made a difference? Absolutely not. It had nothing to do with me, and everything to do with this ridiculous notion that "I can do this because...x, y and z"

I won't go on, because this will turn into a full on criticism of the opposite sex, and this isn't meant to be that. I just want people to know that this kind of thing happens all the time. Today, tomorrow, it may even become far worse than what happened to me. I'm grateful that it never got that far, but it's definitely given me a sickening insight into the inner workings of certain antiquated minds that believe no is yes, and silence is acceptance.

Zahra D x
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